Many of us have at times felt prompted by the desire to focus on becoming the best version of ourselves, to let our light shine brightly and become the brightest ever! It may be at the start of a new year, a special birthday or the sudden realisation that we’re not getting any younger. Sometimes it’s a ‘now or never’ impulse.

To let your light shine really brightly may mean sorting out old patterns of thinking or behaviour, undertaking personal development, becoming fitter in order to run a marathon or becoming committed to taking your business or career to exciting new heights.

Here are ten tips to help you become the bright star in your life:

– Start by being clear as to what you really want.

Outline your ultimate aims, what the shining version of you looks and feels like. That way you have something measurable to dream about, aim for and focus on.

– Get a good coach or mentor to support and guide you.

The roles of mentor or coach are often very different but either can motivate you to stay on track. Some of your activities will be more important than others so it’s important to be accountable to someone who’s impartial, who asks tough questions and pushes you to focus on your priorities. Whether your coach is paid or has volunteered to help you, it’s important to have someone who treats you seriously, who takes you to task when you’re distracted and motivates you to improve and shine.

– Learn from the best and read self-help books, watch videos and attend seminars.

Invest in improving your skills, find ways to manage stress and support good health, add techniques for a positive mindset, motivation. Copy, shadow and emulate the best.

– Practice stillness and gratitude.

Being a shining star means radiating inner calmness and peace. You can achieve much by moving forward with love and humility rather than with urgency and overwhelm. Allow yourself to be thankful, motivated and filled with faith in yourself and the universe or God. Then your decisions and your inner purpose become much clearer.

– Learn to respond rather than react when situations don’t go to plan.

This provides more control and enables you to stay calm, think clearly and recover in a constructive way.

– Treat failure as stepping-stones to success.

Put yourself out there and remember that a high-jumper only knows they’ve achieved their absolute best when they try and fail to clear the bar. If they clear it they simply raise the bar! Regard failure as feedback; you need to find another way.

– Relish occasional detours as opportunities to experience new and different things.

How quickly do you really need to get from A to B? Some challenges may be time-sensitive, when it’s important to keep a sense of urgency and stay motivated. Otherwise, allow some flexibility and take time to explore new things that present themselves along the way. Let your light shine brightly as you open up a more adventurous side to yourself.

– Appreciate that sacrifices have to be made along the way.

You may have less disposable income, less time to spend with family or friends. Your hobbies and interests may need to be side-lined for a while. Accept this as a price you’re prepared to pay to move from where you were to where you want to be. But also include time for rewards and treats. It may mean taking a little longer with your journey, but will succeed in making your experience more pleasurable and satisfying.

– Give stuff away.

Let your light shine brightly by introducing the new you to the world at large. It can be good experience to give talks, write blogs and make yourself openly accessible. Share your experiences en route to success; people love stories of triumph over adversity and you’ll be able to spread the word, enhance your reputation and gain some ambassadors who’ll be happy to sing your praises.

– Ignore the trolls and critics.

Negative comments may need consideration, but trust your instincts and assess what motivating factors could be behind unhelpful comments or feedback. Your radiance and enthusiasm may be disconcerting to your circle, who may feel forced to acknowledge their own apathy or inertia. Receive constructive criticism with a smile. It can be informative to hear other people’s perceptions of you, as well as providing opportunities to tailor what you’re doing.

Don’t forget about fun and time off. Breaks provide time for reflection and are a good way to manage stress and burn out. Dedicate some time to family, friends, hobbies and interests. Let others be supportive, helpful and able to understand the times you’re perhaps preoccupied, grouchy or in need of a hug. Let your light shine brightly and include laughter, humour and balance, so becoming a shining star in the different areas of your life.

Susan Leigh is a long established counsellor, hypnotherapist, writer and media contributor who works with clients to help with relationship conflict, stress management, assertiveness and confidence issues. She works with individual clients, couples and provides corporate workshops and support.

She’s author of 3 books, ‘Dealing with Stress, Managing its Impact’, ‘101 Days of Inspiration #tipoftheday’ and ‘Dealing with Death, Coping with the Pain’, all with easy to read sections, tips and ideas to help you feel more positive about your life.

To order a copy or for more information, help and free articles visit

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